From Canvas, To Life.
“How you do anything, is how you do everything.”
When I heard this quote from Martha Beck, it literally rocked my world. It made me immediately look at how I go about my life in every single way. For example, I’m the type of person that lets things get very cluttered and messy over a period of time before I do a huge clean up operation. Which means, I am the type of person who drives a car on deflated tyres, the engine light on, no oil and think it’s ok because it’s not due an MOT or service yet and I’m not dead. Everything is fine, everything is fine, everything is fine… until it’s not.
Anyway, this isn’t a story about how haphazard I am (although I love that about myself, I’m living my best “Artist Life”… and I’m not dead). As I have been painting recently without the pressure I usually put on myself to share everything on social media, I have started to give myself some mental space to make the correlation between painting a canvas to living life. So here are the life lessons I have learnt, through my practice of painting…
1. The Blank Canvas - A World of Possibilities
Think of a blank canvas. It’s full of possibilities. Like a new born baby, new job, relationship, moving house, starting a business, going to university, leaving everything you know to travel the world. You haven’t started yet, but it’s possible to make it happen.
2. The First Brush Stroke - Taking A Leap of Faith
This is the most courageous part of any journey. You have took the leap of faith to give it a go. Think of the baby, finally gaining the strength to stand up and take their first unassisted step. It has still yet to experience the whirlwind of life ahead of them. But the first step is all that’s needed to begin. This can be applied to finally submitting that application, or researching for houses on the market to rent/buy, etc.
3. The Unknown - “What The Fuck Am I Doing?”
This is the ugly part. You have took that leap and now you’ve started something. You had a vision in mind but it seems so far away and all you can see are the few small brushstrokes of the new painting and you think to yourself, how is that EVER going to be a fully fledged piece? You have the vision in your head, but you can’t see it at all in the physical plane. At this point, you have to just proceed, brush stroke by brush stroke until you even get a glimpse of what you’re hoping to achieve.
4. Trusting The Process - Knowing It Will All Work Out
You realise that you can’t go back. Once life starts, you can’t go back in time. Once you start a new relationship, you can’t unmeet the person. Once you start a new life outside of your hometown, you can’t imagine what it’s like to have never left. Sure, you can quit and start over again, but all the unfinished projects begin to take up space (believe me, I have many unfinished paintings, and maybe some unfinished business that will come back and bite me in the arse, or continue to blossom… Who knows? Either way, if they are unfinished, they are taking up space). You have the realisation of there being no turning back, there is no other choice but to trust your initial vision again. You carry on moving forward. At this point you stop caring whether you’re doing anything “right“ or “wrong” because you know no matter what you do, in the end, everything will be exactly the way it’s supposed to be. The painting will look exactly how it’s supposed to look.
5. Painting From The Heart - Having Fun With It.
Now there is less pressure and more trust, this is the time where you really just get into the swing of things. All the scary stuff is over, you have worked through your shadows (e.g. doubts, fear of rejection, trying to control the outcomes, terrified to make a mistake etc) and now there is nothing left but to enjoy the ride. This is honestly the best part. I believe that’s why with each new decade that passes by, people start to give less fucks. A mid-life crisis, isn’t always a crisis, but a remembrance that it’s okay to not take things so seriously. This is what you see when a toddler runs riot and just gets back up when they fall over, laugh and run again. In the context of painting, it’s when we stop painting from a place of fear and paint from the heart. In my case, this is the part where I’m in the studio, painting expressively, the music comes on, I’m dancing around like a fairy, eating snacks, smiling and giggling and literally feel like I’m being seduced in the process. It’s the part the where I finally feel free and uninhibited, the most present to the moment right in front of me. The trusting of the process stays unwavering, because how can you possibly fail when you enjoyed yourself along the way?
6. The Masterpiece! - A Recollection Of Everything.
In the end, you have a finished piece. Whether you think it’s beautiful or not is subjective to you, but regardless of your opinion on it, it has gone through many trials and tribulations. You have learned many lessons and made the transition from the head to the heart at some point (I hope!). You can compare the end of ones life to a finished painting (or the end of a chapter if you don’t want to go there)... Each brush stroke represents a specific moment in time. Every meal you have ever eaten, every place you have ever visited, every word uttered from your mouth, every friend you have made, every friendship lost, every lover, every heartbreak, all the things that worked out, and all the mistakes you’ve made, its all there in the masterpiece we call life. Every time you look at this masterpiece you are reminded of the times you had to keep moving forward.
In the trust the process phase (the part where we are most likely to give up) we often fear we are wasting our time. “What if the painting turns out disgusting?” We ask, but if we enjoyed ourselves along the way, it would be impossible to dislike what we have created when we take a step back and look at all the we have achieved.
The part of the process where you are unable to see the end result, in hindsight, becomes the most memorable phase because it will never look like that again. It will never look shoddy and sparse again when its finally finished. Without the ugly phase, the beauty of the masterpiece can not exist. Those in-between moments are what gives the painting it’s depth, perspective and texture. It’s the stuff that makes life worth living despite its most gruelling moments.
